A Response To My Most Recent Rejection (rated R)

Muther humper. I vowed I wouldn’t write about writing-angst anymore, but I just got another bastard rejection letter. I mean, what the fuck? What on earth is going on in this hell-hole? It is a damned fine rejection letter, though. It’s really fucking nice. Like unbelievably sparkly shit nice. For real. I just don’t understand what the letter MEANS. I mean, I have no fucking clue. See for yourself: “Dear Tanya,

Thank you so much for letting me look over “Foodies Rush In”! My reader absolutely loved “Foodies Rush In”, but it contains too much cursing and she thinks if you change it up, it would affect the integrity of the story…From what she said, someone is going to snatch this one up soon anyway!”

What is that? What does she mean I fucking curse too much? I NEVER curse. I’m a fucking clean-mouthed bitch to the power of a ho. For real. I mean, my vocabulary is so fucking sparkly people think I’m a mother fucking VAMPIRE. I could teach kindergartners and those little ass munches would use language so fucking colorful that…

Uh….

Wait a second here.

Just let me re-read a little bit.

Uh huh. Okay.

Yep.

Ah.

I think I see what she’s saying.

Good to know.