This is not a blog about clowns.

This is not a blog about clowns. I hate clowns. They’re scary because you never know what could be under that makeup. There could be ANYTHING under that makeup, like an alien or something, or maybe even Mitt Romney. Clowns are way freaky.  

So. This is not a blog about clowns. No. I want to write a blog about sparkly things. Things that make me happy. Stupid, lighthearted things that fill me with joy.


Here are things that make me happy:

1. When my daughter talks about her ‘brudder’ or that one day she wants to be an ‘ahrtist and a writah and a mudder’.

2. I like when my son dances. He has a gift for bad dancing, which I like to believe he inherited from me. I’ve spent years perfecting my bad moves…and my son just possibly could be an absolute genius.

3. I like that instead of giving me flowers, Kealoha gave me a Bigfoot App for my phone. You take a picture and then you can add Bigfoot into the picture. ANY picture. I expect crazy hijinks to ensue.


4. I like that I TOLD Kealoha that he should buy me that app. I like that I wasn’t even subtle about it. I was just all “Dude. Buy me that app. It’s cheaper than flowers.” (I was too lazy to do it myself.)


5. I like random videos about cats. Cats! Who doesn’t like cats?


6. Dips make me happy. Both the kinds you eat and the people kind. Wait. Does that sound like I like to eat people? Eating people, AKA cannibalism, does NOT make me happy. Clowns probably eat people and then laugh about it. Fuckers.


7. My students make me happy, especially when they look really bored at first and then they’re reluctantly interested and then later in the semester they tell me that they ‘actually sorta enjoyed the class and it didn’t completely suck’.


8. Blogging makes me happy.


9. I like owls.


I was going to add another one to the list, but I also like when lists surprise you, like when you’re expecting #10 and it just doesn’t show up. That #10 is a No Show. That #10 is out getting a reuben or a Cuban sandwich (which are my two favorite sandwiches.)


Enjoy your day. Don’t think about clowns.