Day 2 NY: Rare bathrooms and psychic surgery

My plan was to come to New York, go to this little writing conference by day, go to restaurants and shows and out drinking at night, and blog about the whole experience. Promises, promises. So, yeah. I underestimated a few things here.

First, there are hardly any public toilets in New York. They exist, but they’re hidden. What does this have to do with blogging? Well, I spend an inordinate amount of time obsessing about where is the next pee stop. Women, you know what I’m talking about. I’m drinking coffee like crazy to stay awake and spirited, but it makes my bladder all crazy. So that’s taken my mind off blogging.

The second thing is there’s also hardly any free wifi. You can find pockets here and there, but if you want wifi, you’ve got to pay for it. And pay a lot. I guess I’m cheap. I’ve broken down and paid for it at the hotel, but I’m not there all that much.

And the third things I underestimated was just how tired I’d be after the conference. Yesterday, we spent all day listening to book pitch after book pitch. I’m not kidding. ALL DAY. We’d listen to the pitch, give comments, and answer the writer’s questions. It was grueling. I learned a lot, and I also understand why some editors and agents get crabby. When you hear a bad pitch or encounter a writer who isn’t prepared and there are a hundred other writers in line waiting to pitch to you, you sort of feel like “You’re wasting my time”. My goal now is to be so interesting and prepared that I won’t see the editor’s eyes glaze over.

So far this has been a fantastic trip including great food and drinks with Kealoha at a Cuban restaurant, walking around NYC, and last night we saw a terrific show called “Play Dead”. It was creepy and scary and there were moments when you’re in total darkness and then you feel something scurry across your head. And then Kealoha was called up on stage, put on a table, had his shirt lifted, and then had a psychic surgery  in which the magician pulled out all these guts and gore from K’s exposed belly and (oh yeah) a naked woman crawled out too. I wasn’t happy about a naked woman crawling over Kealoha, but he assures me the lights were so bright he didn’t notice her nipples. He said he could only see her when she transformed into an old dead woman.

You’d think I made the above up. I assure you, it’s all true.

As I write this, I’m sitting in my hotel room. I’ve got a busy day today. First pitch to a major publishing house. I feel really confident about the pitch…now I just hope that an editor bites and wants to read it. And if they read it, I hope the novel is strong enough. I think it is. And if it’s not, by golly, I’ll make sure it gets there. I’m so motivated right now I could like, kick things.

Maybe I should cut back on the coffee.